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 FEATURE # 77
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Happy New Year and 300+ wishes
(02/01/2012)

It was a time of New Years in ripe teenage or in the aftershock, my male friends openly lamented for not having too many cards from the prospective girl friends and the female friends whispered. Me, usually observed all those things and showing a careless approach to receive the cards written, ‘My Best Friend’, pampered myself charitably, especially when it were from never-think-of , ‘unwanted’ personalities.
It was a time; in my mid-twenties, suddenly started the flow of cards being heave on my awfully shaped cot, and the signatures, most of the times abbreviated or disguised in something very personal, on those came from teenagers to mid-thirty womenfolk made the cot decorated. In this passage of time, I got confused with my identity and felt the urge, for the first and final instance, to go back to adolescence with all the maturity of the ripe age for short-period, to be in the normal course of age in quick succession.

It was a time of New Years in ripe teenage or in the aftershock, my male friends openly lamented for not having too many cards from the prospective girl friends and the female friends whispered. Me, usually observed all those things and showing a careless approach to receive the cards written, ‘My Best Friend’, pampered myself charitably, especially when it were from never-think-of , ‘unwanted’ personalities.
It was a time; in my mid-twenties, suddenly started the flow of cards being heave on my awfully shaped cot, and the signatures, most of the times abbreviated or disguised in something very personal, on those came from teenagers to mid-thirty womenfolk made the cot decorated. In this passage of time, I got confused with my identity and felt the urge, for the first and final instance, to go back to adolescence with all the maturity of the ripe age for short-period, to be in the normal course of age in quick succession.
However, I am not quite sure if it was a kind of spirit of life or discovery or the initiation of a longer dilemma, to-be-or-not-to-be with life, to be continued. In the deconstruction, the technology, I suppose, Internet, with its quality, the then found ‘wonder’, of negotiating an ‘online friendship’ effortlessly helped work out my equations, probably for wrong solutions.
I could remember hearing over headphone silently and talking loudly at the mouthpiece made other in cubes laugh at cybercafés. Anyway the cafes never showed up with coffee at any point of time I was with them as full time admirer barring one case, a cybercafé owner for embarrassment caused by his inability to explain why the word, ‘Café’ he uses with his livelihood earning source, even when he finds taste of coffee very bitter, was compelled to compensate his failure, more to stop me from digging him amid sweet chuckles from the faces confined in the cubes, with ‘Coffee-bite’ toffees in absence of his eagerness to buy ‘bitter’ coffee-drink.
I got someone writing message, from till then unfamiliar to me mobilephone, of shades on the moon and the night it retreats its light while attending gastronomic class in a high school somewhere in other half of the globe or to go for another one hour with the conversation of the day’s weather initially started with a time-limit of three to four minutes left in first-break of the day, a teacher missed her class of describing binary definition of some computer related topic yet to be known to me.
It was one poetess, whose husband hails of Shillong, never heard of Agartala, did not read Shakespeare, Milton, Keats fearing of getting influenced.
It was one Vairobi from Bangladesh who never used ‘Tumi’, (Bengali word to address someone near and dear very intimately) while talking over telephone or online-headphone -mouthpiece union for a topic like childhood days and never used, ‘Apni’ (Bengali word to address someone with extreme formality) while conversing, in text-messages, suppose about Student-politics of that nation.
It was one Princes, by name, who bet 500 dollars for a Tic-tac-toe session and when got defeated, practically was about to transfer the money, I persuaded her to forget the condition like bet as if I were in the losing part I could not pay that and enjoy the second session, she initially was surprised, then amused and in second phase she suspected me of not having any legitimate way of getting it, like I was under compulsion like in prison or a bankrupt man thus could not have any bank account, etc. For a matter of fact, I was not in jail, though slightly better than that and did not have any bank account.
Finally Princes gave me a wild offer to meet her anywhere in the world.

It were the sessions, when I put the choice of topics, anything ranging from toothbrush to alien to converse. I did have interests in politics and sometimes opted a topic like sex and politics as there were few to bear the word, politics but the topic had been graduated to the coining of ‘Sexual Politics’ or ‘Political Sex’ that invariably got accepted to include affairs of commodity driven economy to reservation for women and even men’s abuse corollary.

The New Years were full of messages, e-cards that took me 3/4 days to go through all those and several weeks to stop browsing those.
This year, it seems like a repetition of the flow, more than 300 Short Messages encroached my mobileset in last 24 hours, most of them in wee hours when I was unnoticed of the sound getting out from the set, suppressed under the pillow. I reverted back none.
Half of the senders I could not recognize, it seems either my number was mistaken in a same period of time coincidentally by many or the networks got a scope to poke the DND registered number at higher rate than the usual considering the New Year spun a merciful event, or even those supposed the user of the number in the time must had gone dipped in booze, thus time for fulfilling quotas of SMS committed to commercial clients.

I have not mentioned in the post pre-load any of my affairs with the Male Netizens, though there were many like one even came to my Agartala house, stayed three/four days, etc.
In the tune of the New Year celebration here, the effects of eye tattering sale-offers, star dropped restaurants, wishing birthday soon after 12 night on last night of the year to who factually took birth in January 1st morning, and spree of availing all of those, even not knowing the calendar that starts with January 1 is called The Gregorian calendar, the mention of male friends, talks between two males is unmatchable.
This time I am sure, many already are loosing the interest while some are appreciating this explanation and going this part speedy, this juncture of the lifestyle~not life~ does not permit anything oblique though looms everything in oblique and in extreme point does nothing but hopes for miracle and prays for that.
I am quite sure of the reasons. I have not gone in length of the Political Sex and even have not mentioned about one young doctor from Pakistan who started entering into my box with tag-line, ‘You Indian, means our enemy’ and later she developed to call me, ‘Jigri Dost’ (Close Friend) while she crushed the policies or lack of policies in both sides of the border that let her built the notion she carried earlier.
Rather to be in the line, I could recall, my encounter with an MBA from Thailand who wanted to sue me for she got disturbed with some unplanned juxtaposed words from me what she considered very romantic in nature and she was losing interest in his Philiphino boy-friend whom she did not see till then as her version went.

This year, messages were like ‘An optimist stays up until midnyt 2 c d newyearin. A pessimist stays up 2 make sure d old year leaves’, ‘ Dear Customer, enhance your wealth with Dhanlaxmi Yantra this year, now it comes with guarantee and Nazar Suraksha Kabaz at free of cost’.
However, none of the 300 messages I got, was from any of my female contacts.
Dipankar Sen Gupta
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